Positive bedtime routines: babies, children and teenagers

A bedtime routine is a series of calming activities that happen in the same order each night. Bedtime routines help children of all ages relax and feel ready for sleep. Bedtime routines change as children move into the teenage years and become more independent. Bedtime routines: what they are and how they help A bedtime routine is when your child does similar activities in roughly the same order each night before they go to sleep. This can help your child fall asleep more easily at bedtime because they know what’s coming, which makes them feel settled and safe. A bedtime routine can also help your child develop good sleep and bedtime habits. Without a good bedtime routine, it can be hard for babies, children and teenagers to settle to sleep. Bedtime routines change and become more flexible as your child gets older. But all children and teenagers – and adults too – benefit from calming, relaxing activities before or at bedtime. This helps them get the sleep they need to play, learn and concentrate during the day. Other tips for good sleep in children include getting natural light during the day and keeping regular sleep and wake times – even on the weekend. Positive bedtime routines for babies, toddlers and preschoolers A positive bedtime routine for babies, toddlers and preschoolers helps soothe and calm your child so they’re ready for sleep. It might start around 20 minutes before your child’s bedtime and include: pre-bed tasks, like having a bath and brushing teeth quiet, enjoyable activities with you, like reading or listening to a story. Here’s an example of a bedtime routine that could start after dinner and a bath: Your child plays quietly for 15-20 minutes. This might be playing with toys, playing a game with you, or listening to music. You and your child share a story. This might happen in a comfortable chair somewhere quiet, or you could put your child to bed and read in bed with them. If your child isn’t already in bed, you put your child to bed. You and your child have a cuddle and a kiss goodnight. When the routine is finished, you let your child know that it’s time for sleep. This means no more stories or talking. Say goodnight to your child, turn out the main light and leave the room. It’s a good idea to keep your child’s bedtime routine and bedtime at around the same time each night. This will also help your child feel ready for sleep. It can take a few weeks, but a positive bedtime routine will improve settling problems, decrease the number of times your child calls out to you at night, and lead to better parent-child relationships. If you’re working on getting your baby or young child to settle better at bedtime, a positive bedtime routine will help. You can start using a gentle routine from about 3 months. Child health professionals will almost always recommend you use a positive bedtime routine along with other strategies for helping babies and toddlers sleep better. Positive bedtime routines for school-age children Bedtime routines help school-age children fall asleep. At this age, your child might be more independent with things like brushing their teeth, but they’ll probably still enjoy quiet play, reading, gentle chat and cuddles with you as part of their bedtime routine. Even as your child becomes more independent or starts to have a later bedtime, it’s still a good idea for them to have a bedtime routine. They might like to help you plan or adjust the bedtime routine as they get older. Here’s an example of a bedtime routine for a school-age child: Your child does homework before dinner if they can, so that they can relax before bed. Your child has a bath or shower. Your child spends time doing relaxing things like drawing, listening to music or playing a game. Your child is likely to get to sleep more quickly if they avoid screens in the hour before bed. You and your child share a story in bed. You can read to your child or ask your child to read to you. You or your child turns out the main light. If your child is anxious, writing down their worries before bedtime or doing breathing exercises can help your child relax for sleep. Bedtime routines for pre-teens and teenagers As your child gets older, their bedtime routines will need to be more flexible. For example, your child might go to bed later some nights because they have a part-time job, do after-school activities, have more homework, or are hanging out with friends. It can still help your child to do the same things in the same order before they sleep each night – for example, turning off digital technology, having a shower, listening to music or reading, and turning out the light. You can encourage your child to work out what helps them feel relaxed and ready for sleep. Healthy daytime and bedtime sleep habits can help your teenage child sleep better. For example, it’s best for your child to keep wake-up times on school days and weekends to within 2 hours of each other. Exercise in the day and no screens before bed will also help. Our content is regularly reviewed for quality and currency. The last review of this article was by Professor Sarah Blunden, clinical psychologist and Director, Paediatric Sleep and Psychology Clinic, Adelaide; Adjunct Professor of Psychology and Paediatric Sleep, CQUniversity; and Adjunct Senior Research Fellow, Monash University. Scientific Advisory Board review was provided by Associate Professor Jill Sewell AM. Agostini, A., & Centofanti, S. (2021). Normal sleep in children and adolescence. Child and Adolescent Psychiatric Clinics, 30(1), 1-14. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chc.2020.08.011. Castiglione‐Fontanellaz, C.E., Schaufler, S., Wild, S., Hamann, C., Kaess, M., & Tarokh, L. (2023). 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